On this blog, I have a tendency to write posts that build on each other. After writing about habits last week, I thought more about how we create and maintain healthy habits. In my research, it’s clear that any type of significant habit formation takes time. And during that time, we can become extremely committed to these new habits and the impact they’ll have in our life. But it’s important to remember that even though habits take time to create, these habits are as permanent as we need them to be for our mental health.

Though the estimated time periods vary, it takes a few months, on average, to form a new habit. And a lot of change can occur during that time, not only in our lives but in the world around us. Forming new habits is not easy. It takes discipline and consistency, and sticking with something for many days, weeks or even months.

In that time, our commitment to these habits can grow very strong – sometimes too strong. When we’re integrating newly-formed habits into our lives, making them a priority is certainly a good thing. But it’s also important to note that we can prioritize them in a way that isn’t always helpful to the other habits we’ve formed.

When it comes to our health and wellness, it’s essential to find what works for us. And the more we build up our tool kit, the more these things need to work together. When I think about the habits I’ve formed, the most successful habits are ones I’ve been able to easily integrate in my day-to-day life. But there have also been habits I wanted to form that didn’t mesh well with my routine. And even though I might have wanted these things to work, they didn’t. But it’s not as easy to accept these changes as you would think.

It might not always feel like it, but our lives change more often than we think. And while we are creatures of habit and routine, it’s always been interesting to me to think that every single day is unique in some way. As much as I’ve changed (or my life has changed) over the years, so have my habits. Some of the habits I have now are ones I couldn’t imagine having years ago. I’m sure a few years (or decades) from now, I’ll have new habits, different habits, that make up my daily life. But for the first time, I’m starting to make the connection that not only is that needed, but it’s a very good thing.

Whether my habits are here for a week, a month or for many years, they serve a purpose in my life. They can have a positive impact on my mental health and wellness, especially when I embrace them for what they are. We are constantly growing and changing as people, and so should our habits. Rather than be fearful of this change, I’m going to try and embrace it for what it is. Hopefully, this means that my relationship with my habits, and myself, will start to change for the better.

What are your thoughts on your habits? Do they constantly change, or do you feel like your habits have lasted for years? Let me know in the comments!

As part of a new recurring series on the blog, I’m going to be sharing a ‘Song of the Month on MBNB. It might be a song I can’t stop listening to at the moment, or a song I have a history with. It could be a song I don’t know much about, or I’ve listened to a thousand times. Regardless of the reason, these songs have inspired me and my mental health, and I want to share them with you. Whether you’ve heard of them or not, I hope these songs give you more insight into my world and my approach to mental health. This month’s song is “You Are Enough” by Sleeping at Last.

One of my favorite things about music is the sheer vastness of it all. It seems like there’s always something more to explore, a new artist to discover or a new type of music to fall in love with. I discovered Sleeping At Last only a few years ago, but the deep dive I’ve gotten to take into this music has brought me so many wonderful experiences. As someone who isn’t very skilled at writing about music, Sleeping At Last’s sound is hard to describe. In my experience, the music drifts between a dream pop kind of sound, something ambient and calming (doing this research has also led me to a type of music called “baroque pop” which sums it up pretty well).

My favorite part of Sleeping At Last’s music is how it makes me feel. I become introspective when I listen to this music; I think about my place in the world, in the lives of others, and how I can better connect with the world around me. There are many songs that are meaningful to me, but the one I want to talk about has been a strong motivator for me on my mental health journey. “You Are Enough” came out in 2014 as part of the “Atlas” album.

As you can probably tell from the title, this song’s lyrics immediately resonated with me. They’ve stuck with me when I experience self-doubt and negative thoughts, and they serve as a reminder of who I am:

You’re enough, you’re enough, you’re enough, you are enough
These little words, somehow they’re changing us
You’re enough, you’re enough, you are enough
So we let our shadows fall away like dust

“You Are Enough” by Sleeping At Last

But it’s not just the lyrics. Sometimes songs that have positive or inspirational messages can feel extremely dramatic, but this one makes me feel…different. The music is lighter, brighter and cleaner. It’s almost as if this songs serves a reminder, something to listen to when we get caught up in the doldrums of life. We’re enough – in fact, we always have been, and we always will be. And this song makes it known and understood that this is a universal truth.

This has become one of my most favorite and consistently played songs; it’s become a song I’ve leaned on during challenging times, and one I play when my anxiety gets the best of me and my brain is moving a million miles per hour. It’s a song I play when my depression seems like it will never end, when I forget that I have a purpose in the world. When I hear it, I smile, and I remember that I am enough.

Regardless of what type of music you like, I encourage everyone reading this post to listen to music that stirs something in you and makes you feel things. This song helps me connect with myself, remember my place in the world, and remind me that I am, and always was, enough. And so are you.

CW: This post discusses suicide and suicide-related topics.

In case you didn’t know, September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month in the United States. Every year, I do my best to use this month as an opportunity to share information, statistics and resources related to suicide prevention. Suicide is not only an extremely serious topic, but a public health issue. We can’t continue to ignore this topic, as hard as it may be to talk about. Suicide prevention means speaking up, sharing our stories, and reminding others that they are not alone.

I’ve been writing about suicide prevention and suicide-related topics since I started this blog six years ago. It’s something that is very personal and close to my heart, both as a mental health advocate and as a person. I understand the struggle of sharing your story – of being afraid to tell someone that you’re hurting, or that you don’t want to be here anymore. It’s one of the reasons I started My Brain’s Not Broken to begin with. I was struggling to share my experience and tell my story. At some point, the idea to start a blog took hold, but it was still years before I got going. As much as I wanted to try and tell my story, it was still hard.

And we know why it’s hard. We see why it’s hard, every single day, to be vulnerable in our society. We don’t want to appear weak. We want to seem like we “have it together” (what that means, I still don’t know). We don’t want people to worry about us, or check up on us. And the shame…oh, the shame. We’re ashamed of our pain, embarrassed that we even have it to begin with. All these reasons, and many more, are why people don’t seek help when they’re hurting.

Sometimes, the consequences for that aren’t that severe. There are levels to pain, just as there are levels to every type of emotion we experience. And that is why suicide prevention is so important – it is truly a life-or-death situation. There is a seriousness to this topic, a weight to it that makes it hard to talk about. But that is exactly why we should be talking about it. Because if we don’t know what we’re up against, how can we fight against it?

There has been a tremendous amount of research and data surrounding suicide in the United States in recent decades. This data has been helpful in recognizing that suicide is a public health issue. That in recent decades, it’s become a leading cause of death in the United States, even while there is acknowledgement that this data is underreported. This issue is not going anywhere and, as we’ve seen, is becoming more prevalent as time goes on.

So, what do we do? How do we talk about a topic that is painful, heavy. and personally taxing for millions of people? I don’t have an easy answer to that question, but the best one I have is this: we start trying. We start trying to have conversations that we haven’t had before. We acknowledge that there are groups of people who are at higher risk for suicide, and we make sure people have the resources they need. We start trying to talk, but we also start trying to listen. Sometimes, people can’t share their stories unless room is made for them to do so. Suicide, like mental illness, does not discriminate. I don’t say that to scare you or make you feel defeated; far from it. If anyone can be impacted, then shouldn’t we stand together? Shouldn’t we be stronger because of that? I think so. In fact, I know so.

This month, I’m hoping to use this blog as a space to share statistics and resources surrounding suicide and suicide prevention. But I’m also hoping to use this space to share people’s stories. If you have a story to share, please get in touch with me – I’d love to give you a platform to talk during this month. We are stronger together and by lifting each other up we can get out of the darkness, together.

As I wrote in my post earlier this month, September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. The month is an important time for us to have the conversations we need about suicide and suicide prevention. In addition to having conversations and sharing stories, it’s also important to share data and statistics that help frame the conversation and spread awareness. Today, I want to share some important statistics in an effort to spread awareness about the growth and prevalence of suicide as a public health issue.

From the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (data from 2021):

• Suicide is the 11th leading cause of death in the United States
• In 2021, 48,183 Americans died by suicide
• In 2021, there were an estimated 1.70M suicide attempts
• The rate of suicide is highest in middle-aged white men.
• In 2021, men died by suicide 3.90x more than women.
• On average, there are 132 suicides per day.
• 94% of adults surveyed in the U.S. think suicide can be prevented.

From the Center for Disease Control and Prevention:

• Overall, the number of deaths by suicide increased from 2021 to 2022 by 2.6 percent
• In 2021, 12.3 million adults seriously thought about suicide
• 3.5 million adults made a plan
• Suicide rates increased 37% between 2000-2018 and decreased 5% between 2018-2020. However, rates nearly returned to their peak in 2021.

Additionally, the CDC also reported that in a recent survey 22% of high school students said that they had seriously considered suicide within the past year, up from 16% in 2011. Eighteen percent said that they had made a suicide plan, and 10% said they attempted suicide at least once, compared with 13% and 8%, respectively, 10 years earlier. All demographic groups across race, ethnicity, and sex experienced increases in suicide risk since 2011.

From the Trevor Project:

• Suicide is the second leading cause of death among young people aged 10 to 24 — and LGBTQ+ youth are at significantly increased risk.
• 45% of LGBTQ youth seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year, including more than half of transgender and nonbinary youth.
• The Trevor Project’s research has found that they were 2.5 times more likely to report a suicide attempt in the past year (33%) compared to their LGBTQ peers (14%).

From the National Alliance on Mental Illness:

• Suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death among people aged 10-14 and the 3rd leading cause of death among those aged 15-24 in the U.S.
• 46% of people who die by suicide had a diagnosed mental health condition
• 90% of people who die by suicide may have experienced symptoms of a mental health condition, according to interviews with family, friends and medical professionals (also known as psychological autopsy)

These numbers paint a pretty clear picture of what suicide and suicide prevention look like in the United States. In order to have a discussion around suicide, it’s imperative that we know what we’re up against. The data shows that over the past few decades, the numbers have drastically gone up when it comes to suicide. And rather than ignore these numbers and treat them like an anomaly, we should include them in our conversations surrounding mental illness, mental health and suicide.

While I know sharing these statistics might seem pessimistic or disheartening, my goal is to do the opposite. Sharing these statistics like this can help spread awareness and educate people about the prevalence of suicide. Hopefully by sharing information like this, we can improve the way we approach suicide and suicide prevention.

CW: This post discusses suicide and suicide awareness.

Suicide Prevention Awareness Month is extremely important for many reasons, but one of the most important is that it’s a chance to have open discussions about suicide and suicide prevention. It’s also a good time to share resources for those who may need them, as well as people looking to share information with their loved ones and communities. Over the years, I’ve been able to put together an extensive list of resources surrounding suicide prevention, which is what I’d like to share again this year.

Below are some links and descriptions to some of the more well-known suicide prevention resources, websites and phone numbers. If you have any questions about anything I’ve listed or want to know more, please get in touch so you can get the information you need.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

For anyone who might have missed it, 988 is now the three-digit dialing code that routes callers to the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Last year, the Lifeline transitioned away from the National Suicide Prevention Line’s previously recognized 10-digit number, to the three-digit 988 Lifeline (the previous 1-800-273-TALK (8255) number will continue to function). The Lifeline provides “free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.” This suicide prevention center offers more resources than just the hotline – there’s an online chat if you can’t talk on the phone, as well as specific resources for Veterans, LGBTQ+, Attempt Survivors and other groups of people who could be at risk.

Crisis Text Line

Talking on the phone isn’t always the best option, and that’s where the Crisis Text Line can help. By texting ‘TALK’ to 741741, you can have a confidential text conversation with someone. The first priority for the Crisis Text line ‘is helping people move from a hot moment to a cool calm, guiding you to create a plan to stay safe and healthy.’

Suicide Prevention Resource Center

The SPRC is the only federally supported resource center specifically about suicide prevention, and they offer information on the best techniques and approaches for suicide prevention. This site is especially helpful in some of the training they offer including online courses and webinars.

The Trevor Project

Founded specifically to focus on suicide prevention for young people in the LGBTQ+ community, the Trevor Project offers several free resources to immediately help those in need including the Trevor Lifeline (1-866-488-7386), Trevor Chat, Trevor Text and Trevor Space (you can reach all of these through their ‘Get Help Now’ page).

Veterans Crisis Line

Like many of the resources offered here, the Veterans Crisis Line offers a confidential hotline, online chat and text support. Another important resource this crisis line provides is that after a call or chat, you can be referred to a Suicide Prevention Coordinator at that person’s local VA medical center.

SAMHSA’s National Helpline

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) national helpline can provide more helpful support not only to people struggling with their mental health but also substance abuse (or both). The helpline makes it a point to note that they take calls in both English and Spanish.

Trans Lifeline

The Trans Lifeline was founded in 2014 as a peer-crisis support hotline, they are a “trans-led organization that connects trans people to the community, support, and resources they need to survive and thrive.” Their peer-support hotline (877-565-8860) is available from 10am-4pm EST in the U.S., and is run both for and by trans people.

Additional Resources

In addition to these helplines, other phone numbers to know include the RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline (1-800-656-4673) and the National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline (1-866-331-9474). If you’re looking to connect with local resources, I would also research helplines and local facilities in your area. Knowing where a local clinic, mental health facility or psychiatric unit of a hospital could be life-saving, especially when you don’t have to do that research during a crisis.

When we share information like this publicly, we’re calling attention to the many ways that people can receive support or feel heard during their struggles. The more information we share, the better prepared we are in the fight against suicide.

During Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, it’s important to share as many resources as possible – if you know of any resources not listed here, please share them in the comments!

How do you have a conversation about a sensitive topic? Where do you even begin? This month, I’ve written several posts about information and resources related to suicide prevention. I’ve been able to compile numbers and information that makes it clear that suicide is a public health issue we need to address as a society. But despite all this information – despite knowing that this is a problem that we need to face – I still have trouble talking about it. A lot of trouble, in fact. And that’s because, while it has improved, talking about suicide and suicide prevention is challenging. So what can we do?

There are several reasons conversations surrounding suicide prevention can be difficult. Mental health, mental illness and suicide are still topics that are stigmatized, making them difficult to bring up at times. There is also the shame factor – people feeling ashamed or embarrassed about their struggle, which can impact how they reach out to someone. Getting help can sometimes be as simple as talking with someone, but it’s not always that easy. So how do we talk about it? What do we do?

One of the main reasons this feels like such a struggle is a lot of the time, we have a reactive approach to suicide prevention. We don’t have conversations unless (or until) someone is clearly struggling, or someone has shared their struggle. In this way, suicide prevention is similar to a lot of other issues – people who have personally dealt with mental illness and/or suicide, or know someone who has, will often be the ones to spearhead conversations around suicide prevention.

But suicide does not discriminate. While there are communities and groups of people who are more at risk than others, suicide can impact people of any age, gender, religion, sex, class or any other demographic. No one is immune to this struggle, and people often have these challenges at various points in their lives. It is, sadly, a reality of our lives in today’s day and age.

Why is it so hard to talk about suicide prevention? Do we think that it’s not allowed? Do we think there needs to be a “good” reason to have this discussion? Are we worried it will bring people down to talk about? I’m trying to find an answer. Maybe, by finding out what makes it so difficult to talk about, we can begin to have the conversations that are needed. We can talk about what to do when people feel isolated, when they are struggling with things like depression or self-harm. We can create an environment where people are not embarrassed to admit they’re struggling, because we all do at times. We’re taking care of each other like our lives depend on it because sometimes, they do.

Talking about suicide and suicide prevention is not easy. To be honest, it might not ever be easy. But we can’t shy away from it. While we’ve improved in the ways we talk about mental illness and mental health as a society, there are challenges we face that weren’t imaginable even a few decades ago. These new challenges require new solutions, and that can’t happen if we don’t have the conversations that are necessary to bring about change.

This month, I hope you can be proactive in the ways you talk about suicide prevention. If there is one thing to take away from today’s post, it’s that we all have a role to play when it comes to suicide prevention. Regardless of what yours is, I hope you can challenge yourself to embrace that role, be brave in that attempt, and work with others in the fight against suicide. Each and every one of us is needed in this work and together, we can create some change.

Let’s be honest: talking about mental health is hard. It’s broad, it can feel all encompassing and because everyone has their own experience, it can become complicated very quickly. Oftentimes, conversations about mental health can be overwhelming, and we can’t always find the solutions we need because of it. While talking about mental health and mental illness is hard, talking about our own mental health is even harder. It can feel impossible for people to talk about their own mental health; in fact, some people never open up about this part of their life. It can involve very personal experiences and emotions they’ve never shared with anyone, and the stigma attached to mental health issues could also play a significant role. When I was first dealing with mental health issues, I was bad about opening up. But somewhere in the last ten years, I got better at sharing my story. Here’s how that happened, and how it changed the way I view myself and my mental health challenges.

I’ve always had a lot of trouble talking about myself. Chalk it up to a lack of self-esteem, introverted nature, whatever you want to call it, but I’ve long been uncomfortable talking about myself and my own experience. But I do think that, beyond my own insecurities and struggles, is a real challenge when it comes to talking about our experiences. Regardless of how confident we feel, there are so many factors to consider when talking about ourselves, especially when it comes to talking about something that can be as sensitive as mental health.

When I started dealing with anxiety and depression, I struggled to talk about it. Beyond my own challenge, it also felt like a logistical puzzle. How much should I tell someone? How much do they care? Am I oversharing, or providing too many unnecessary details? When I’m talking, am I even making sense?

These questions (and a million others ones) are the ones that often got in the way of people opening up. Things quickly become overwhelming, and people can’t have the conversation they were hoping to have. Not only does this perpetuate the stigma surrounding mental health, but it makes it harder for people to open up about the more personal aspects of their lives.

In the ten years I’ve lived with anxiety and depression, I can confidently say I’ve improved at sharing my story and talking about my own mental health. When I think about how I got better at doing this, I kept coming back to one thought: I kept going. The first time I shared my story, I felt extremely awkward. The second time, the third time, the fourth time…same thing. But at some point, talking about this became easier. I learned the right words to use, which gave me confidence to be accurate in what I was saying. I grew more comfortable in being vulnerable, and stood stronger in my story. No matter where you are in sharing your story, I hope you have the courage to continue telling it.

Time can be tricky to manage. Sometimes, it feels like time is moving at a snail’s pace. Other times, it feels like our life is moving faster than we can keep up with – weeks, months (even years!) might feel like they pass in the blink of an eye. Regardless of how it moves, my least favorite aspect of time is when I tend to lose track of it.

This fall, I celebrated six years of blogging. In fact, this is my 500th post on My Brain’s Not Broken – a number so high I can’t even process it at the moment (and no, I didn’t intend for this post to be number 500, but here we are!). At some point a few years ago, I got into the rhythm of writing two blog posts per week. It felt manageable, I had a lot to write about, and I felt like there was a ton of experience to pull from in writing my posts. But in the past few months, I started to feel pressure when it came to my blog, and it was a new experience for me.

I’ll be clear, though; all this pressure was internal. I don’t quite know when it happened but somewhere in the past few years, I started to feel the pressure I’d put on myself to churn out two blog posts every week. For all you creators out there – you know what it’s like to put out content because you’ve made a commitment and you told yourself you would do it. The goals I set for this blog are entirely internal and up to me to create and yet, I feel extreme pressure from myself all the time to live up to the expectations I set – even if those expectations aren’t always realistic.

This post is my way of trying to return to this space feeling a little fresher, a little more rested, and ready to get back into blogging. But in the spirit of honesty, that’s not entirely true. Sometimes, taking a break from something can give us the rest we need. But it can also become a source of anxiety and stress if we don’t know what our break is for or how long we’re doing it. When I take a break from something, that’s usually what happens.

Unfortunately, I am not returning to this space refreshed, or ready to tackle this project with a fresh sense of perspective. However, I am returning with a renewed purpose. Going forward, I might not be posting as much as I’d prefer. But I’ve determined that continuing to write, to continue sharing my story and the stories of others is ultimately more important than not posting at all. I’ve seen the power and strength that come when people speak up about mental health and mental illness, and it’s these moments that continue to fuel me.

However this journey continues for My Brain’s Not Broken, I am excited. I want to give myself the grace and understanding I give to others because we’re often kinder to other people than we are to ourselves. Even though mental health awareness has improved in many ways since I started this blog, people’s mental health and wellness are being tested in ways that I couldn’t imagine a decade ago. All I can do now, in this moment, is to keep moving at my own pace, deliberately, head held high, one foot in front of the other. And I hope that when you have these same moments when you feel like you have no more to give, you can find it in yourself to do the same.